So yes, you may have noticed that I am Scottish and yes I have red hair.
A tiny minority of people that I have come across in my global travels (i.e. within a 30 mile radius!) have some worrying misconceptions about us Scots and how we live.
WE AREN'T ALL GINGER!*
*I hate the word Ginger, with a vengeance, call me ginger, get a sore face. I'm auburn!
Like a good box of chocolate we come in many different varieties!
Including these ones ladies!
WE DON'T DRESS IN TARTAN EVERYDAY!
Kilts are expensive and heavy! My other half paid over £1000 for his kilt nearly twenty years ago.
We don't skip through the glens covered in head to toe in tartan!
Fashion has embraced tartan and designers including Vivienne Westwood have come up with some incredible designs.
HAGGIS DO NOT WANDER FREELY!
Well to be more exact they do not wander at all as they look more like this (vegetarians look away now).
I actually really enjoy haggis, it is not for everyone, especially the aforementioned vegetarians, but as long as I don't think about what is in it, it is delicious.
WE DON'T LIVE ON IRN BRU AND SHORTBREAD
I do love both these things and we are not known for having the best diets in the world but what country is? Japan probably!
Anyway we have lots of lovely food here including delicious salmon, haddock and other fish, gorgeous cheeses and tender beef.
In just about every village and town a deli has sprung up selling local produce, in my own small town we have our own coffee roasters, several artisan deli's along with our beautiful river which is full of fish!
Plus we are responsible for some kick ass chefs including Andrew Fairlie of Gleneagles Hotel and not forgetting F***ing foulmouthed Gordon Ramsay.
WE DON'T ALL LIKE WHISKY!
Can't stand the stuff, the first time I ever got drunk was on it, never touched it since. The smell makes me gag. I could be in the minority as whisky is drunk the world over.
I'm lucky enough to live within a ten minute walk of a distillery, it is actually a beautiful place but standing outside it for even a couple of minutes makes me feel tipsy from the fumes.
THE LOCH NESS MONSTER
I can neither confirm or deny Nessie's existence!
I DO NOT KNOW YOUR GREAT, GREAT, GREAT, GREAT GRANDMA
When I am able, I like to visit Florida on holiday and in my travels around the Sunshine State it never fails to amaze me the amount of people with Scottish heritage, I love it!
But I do have to bite my tongue when some of them ask if I know their family or the village where they lived. No I Don't!!!! But hey come visit us (but wait till our summer on the 15th of August at around 4pm)
WE ARE AN EXTREMELY PROUD NATION
We are proud of our inventions, creations and discoveries which include
Tarmac for Roads
Publishing the 1st Encyclopaedia Britannica
Discovery of Insulin
Discovery that mosquitoes carry malaria
Bank of England!!!!
and not forgetting most important of all....
Taylor Swift's cat, a Scottish Fold!
Well actually there are loads and loads of things that we take credit for, if you are interested a list of our inventions is here on reliable website Wikipedia, though I am pretty certain most of above is correct!
Plus the Scottish Government have this sweet info graphic which includes some more things!
PLUS WE ARE KINDA GOOD AT THE FOLLOWING TOO
PLUS SCOTTISH BLOOD RUNS THROUGH THESE VEINS!
AND SERIOUSLY THESE TWO - OMG WOW- I HAD TO DOUBLE CHECK!
To sum up, we pretty much created the modern world as we know it!
You are very welcome!
Are you of Scottish descent, could I know you relatives?
Seriously though let me know we could be related!!!